Almost Better: Part II

Teaching 1st grade last week, I made a little boy cry. We were writing a story together as a class, and he was distraught that in the story, the robot did not win the race. Literally, bawling in the corner, curled up in the fetal position, I made him cry. It was indirectly, but I did facilitate the reason for tears. I think I teach that class tomorrow, so hopefully we can fix the problem...


Changing gears-- I read this quote recently:

"Opportunities flit by while we sit regretting the chances we have lost, and the happiness that comes to us we heed not, because of the happiness that is gone."

-Jerome K. Jerome

I am happy. I know I am happy. I am so happy to be with Colin. I am so happy to be coming closer to the goal of graduating. I am so happy for the upcoming opportunities that await us as soon as we do graduate.



I had a girl tell me today that she thought I had a great attitude considering everything that has happened. She said that she was impressed I can be so positive and supportive of things despite everything that has happened. I laughed at her, thinking maybe I'm a better actress than I thought. Probably not...

I still have the heartache--that heartache from missing out on something thought to be right. The lack of interaction with certain people is slowly crushing my heart. I want to throw something every time I get an email from a certain director because he hasn't taken us off his email list yet. And even still, I cry over this. It usually comes when I least expect it- sometimes when I am driving from student teaching, sometimes when I am doing homework at 3pm on a Monday, Wednesday or Friday, and every time I get one of those emails.

I am happy though. I just can't help but feel that I could be a small bit happier.